I love them. Like a well worn pair of trainers I’m comfortable with them. They work. Usually, brilliantly. The families like the novelty of a witty Vicar who intertwines profound biblical teaching and comedy. That would be me! But the natives are growing restless. The congregational members who traipse the length and breadth of the country attending the weddings of friends are dying for some new material. So this post is more of a plea than anything. In exchange I offer the two funniest lines from recent weddings. I’d put them in the thigh slapping category.

The first was from the best man about the groom. The names have been changed to protect reputations! The best man said, ‘Bill’s first job was working in ASDA. So I went back to talk to his colleagues. I asked them what they thought he’d be when he left. They said, ‘…65′!

The second was from the father of the bride who up until the moment of this gag had been playing it safe. Speaking of his daughter’s marriage he said, ‘I look upon it not so much as losing a daughter as … gaining a bedroom!’

This one isn’t strictly a wedding gag but it’s just too good not to include. In our children’s slot yesterday we looked at Psalm 42:1 ‘As a deer pants for flowing streams, so pants my soul for you O God’. Someone  said they used to belong to a church where the preacher actually said, ‘this verse is telling us that in our spiritual life we need bigger stronger pants!’